Thursday Thirteen # 3

Thirteen family phrases and sayings etc

1. "There's nothing like a well ironed gusset!" - My Mum actually really likes ironing and she's not just kidding on. She actually said this when I said to her "Why in the name of the wee man are you ironing knickers!!"
2. "Are you having a party with balloons and hot Ribena?" - Steph was feeling quite left out when at the age of 3 she had been sent to bed whilst all us adults sat and chatted and laughed. Finally the sound of our increasing hilarity was too much for her and she stamped down the stairs and burst into the sitting room. Standing with her hands on her hips she challenged us with "Are you having a party with balloons and hot Ribena?" obviously her idea of a really good time and now used as a phrase to indicate that one of us is feeling left out of a good time!
3. "Once Upon a long time ago when dinosaurs roamed the earth, before television was invented and when your Mum was just a little girl ..." The way our made up stories start thanks to my Dad, who always followed this bit with "... there lived a handsome prince called Brian..." no prizes for guessing his name!
4. "Dearest most beautiful Aunt Les I like your hair - please can I have..." yes I damn well do make them all say it when they want something! and not just them, my friends say it, previous work mates said it... yup! I'm that needy!"
5. Can I smell Garlic?"

to which the reply is always "If you want to!"

"Nothing - she loves you!" When one of us had just yelled "MUM!!" in order to rat on a sister and Mum had replied "What?!" the about to be ratted on shouted this whilst clamping her hand firmly over the mouth of the ratter. Ha. And Mum never even twigged. No really.

"I'm too big!"

- as an excuse for trying to get out of doing anything, it comes from Holly getting big and small muddled a bit when younger.

"When I was a little girl..." this is the way my papa Les and my dad would always begin reminiscences of their childhoods... strange.

"Damn that creaky floorboard!" fart? My family? Never!! the house just creaks a lot!

"Hanging from my bottom lip shouting Tarzan!" a singularly unhelpful phrase usually used by Mum first thing in the morning when we were looking for essentials like pants and had asked her where they were. She's lucky we didn't go to school naked.

"Listen to me Matilda Jane!!" by Mum - accompanied by hands on hips and glaring, when you were in for a BIG telling off this was the phrase that prefaced it. Slightly bizarre given that none of us are called Matilda. Or Jane.

"Quelle slut?" meaning what time is it? derived from our rubbish, but entertaining when you're 13, pronunciation of heure as hoor, the phrase "Quelle heure et il?" being then conveniently shortened.

"Happy Eldest Daughter's Day!" May 15th in case you're wondering and why yes, I am the eldest daughter! frankly I just wasn't getting enough presents in my life not having any kids or husbands cuts down on what you get - so if you're in the same situation take my tip and give yourself a Day! It works, I get cards and presents every year.